kitchen_maid | Continental Breakfast Included

The King and Queen have a great many parlors at their disposal, ranging from the very grand to somewhat very grand.

And then there is this one, which is generally reserved for the use of the family and their closest personal friends. It is a comfortable, sunlit sort of room, where one may find the children's toys and the Amy's embroidery and Perry's carving projects.

It is also where Amy has instructed her staff to lay out a breakfast for her friends this morning. They were all shown back to their rooms for what was left of the night before after their adventures, to at least attempt to get some rest.

Amy herself is a bit busy at the moment catching up on Official Matters: giving reports to the Deputy Captain of the Palace Guard and the Court Historian, seeing to the palace's new ghost (she's settled him in the Northwest tower, which is, she assures him, a perfectly lovely place to haunt), and reassuring her husband that yes, darling, she really is perfectly all right. She'll be along when she can.

In the meantime, everyone is free to make their way into the parlor in their own time. When they arrive, they will likely find company, and definitely find a table laid with everything the kitchens could find to send up: bread and jam and marmalade, cakes and pastries, eggs and bacon and sausages, a giant bowl of fruit, tea and juice and milk.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

He pulls a half-shrug, half-smile.

'I suppose. I get plenty of that too. Easiest to just ignore it.'

It's not like he cares.

'I can't imagine your people insulting you much. People love royalty, don't they?'

He doesn't have much experience with it, but that's the general impression he got from the reaction of the crowd at the football game.

"Most of the time. We're fortunate."

Also, the respect and devotion of her subjects was one of her wedding presents from her fairy godmother.

"People have expectations about royalty. I haven't always met them.

"I was a dreadful disappoint as a Princess, I'm afraid."

She makes a much better Queen.

'Oh yeah?'

His eyebrows raise, sceptical in a teasing kind of way.

'I find that hard to believe.'

"Wrong hair, wrong eyes, wrong nose, freckles. And a distressing habit of running off to play in the woods instead staying in and fretting about my complexion whilst playing the harp. My royal parents thought they were never going to find a husband for me. None of it bad, none of even anything I dislike about myself, but not at all what was expected of a Princess of Phantasmorania."

And there were definitely times she was more than a little jealous of her six "perfect" sisters.

"Even now, almost no one here knows that when Perry met me I was working as a kitchen maid in the palace. Populaces can be dreadful snobs, you know.

"I'd run away from home, you see. I didn't want to get married. And definitely not to some silly prince who'd slain a hired dragon."

'Why were you working as a kitchen maid?'

That sounds pretty unusual, even to him.

'But I'm pretty sure the presence of freckles isn't - or shouldn't be - enough to disqualify someone from being a princess.'

"Bless you, Bruce, but I'm afraid I had a few dozen suitors who felt very differently about freckles and mouse-colored hair and turned-up noses on Princesses.

"So when my parents and the Council decided that no one was ever going to offer to marry me, they decided to hire a dragon. It's not unheard of, as a plan to find a husband for a less-than-beautiful girl. You hire a dragon to lay waste to the countryside -- in a controlled fashion, of course -- lock the girl in question in a tower, and then proclaim that whomsoever slayeth the dragon gets her hand in marriage. And, well, once he's a slain a dragon for you, no prince can refuse to marry you. It simply isn't done.

"Only I found out about it. And I didn't care for the plan at all. So I ran away from home. And I stayed in the Forest for a while, but then my dress got quite ragged, and I needed to get a job to buy a new one. By then I'd wandered clear across the Forest of Faraway to the Ambergeldar side. So I took a job as the fourteenth assistant kitchen maid in the palace here. I thought it would be interesting to work in a castle instead of living in one."

It's like something out of a fairytale. Which...given what he's seen of this place, actually makes a lot of sense.

'So how did you go from that, to becoming queen?'

A beat.

'Don't tell me - glass slipper?'

"No, though I've a great uncle, I think it is, who met his wife that way.

"I actually met Perry in Milliways when I was Bound, and we figured out that we were coming in from the same place and time. And I told him I was a kitchen maid, and he told me he was a man of all work, and I was really a Princess and he was really the King. I don't think either of us fooled the other for long.

"And I fell in love, and I decided that maybe I needed to rethink my policy of never, ever getting married. And that having Perry was worth putting up with crowns and courtiers and councilors for the rest of my life.

"Besides, he likes my freckles."

Bruce grins.

'Well, who wouldn't?'

He can't understand why anyone would have anything against freckles.

'He seems like a decent guy. And you know, it is possible to get by with only a couple of really trusted staff. One, in my case.'

Another beat.

'Though probably not if you're actual royalty.'

"He's an exceedingly decent guy."

As to the rest . . .

"We certainly have a small group of really and truly trusted staff. And we probably could get by with a much smaller staff than we have.

"But then where would those people make their livings?"

'Find them other jobs.'

He says it, and immediately checks himself.

'I mean, I'm just talking about my world. Things are obviously different here.'

Royalty is a symbol for people, and he knows all about those. It's probably a lot more complicated when you get down to the logistics of staffing, and whatnot. People have expectations.

"But where?" Amy asks. "Doing what?

"Directly or indirectly, Perry and I provide some or all of the livelihoods of, oh, easily half the Capitol.

"If we stop, there really aren't enough other jobs for them to take."

She shrugs a little.

"So we probably could get by with a smaller staff, but I'm not sure we should. It's not just about what we need or want."

'I guess - yeah. I mean, it's different where I come from. Big city.'

He stops.

'But actually, there aren't that many jobs around there, either. So yeah, I see your point.'

He's not sure how they got on to this, but it's interesting that some problems seem to be universal.

Amy nods, and then smiles.

"Which is not to say that there aren't occasionally days I wish I could walk down a corridor without having a half dozen people ask me if there's anything they can fetch for me."

'Do you ever just make stuff up so they'll have somewhere to go?'

He would, if Alfred were that persistent.

"All the time.

"But you mustn't tell."

He grins. No problem there.

'Secret's safe with me.'

If all royalty were like Amy, the world would probably be a much nicer place.

Continental Breakfast Included

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